And just to spice things up, I became an ordained minister today…

Seriously, boy…
Stop messing with my head
Muse is currently in therapy
She’s got a speech impediment.

No really, boy…
Quit playing with my mind
Muse’s analgesics aren’t working
She’s running out of time.

I mean it now, boy…
Halt all communication
Muse went on vacation
She’s returned to her station.

It’s the last time I’ll say it, boy…
Abdicate or bust
Muse lost conversation
She’s found a new lust.

(you L-O-V-E her, don’t you?)
or was it something she said...

Alternative Ethos?
More like punk rock…
Suicide bombers
Just sold there stock.

Communism fell and landed on my slap
Liberal deities decided to snack
Big Business called, their babies now sick
The Earth wrote a song, but lost her guitar pick.

What happened to free love? Lost to progress (they say)…
Where condom’s reign supreme
And the developed World lost pay.

Shapely maneuvers
Cause Stock Market fires
Like demons they falter
On the heels of a liar.

The plank in your eye is as big as a Bush
The oil in your car
Makes you get out and push.

Enigmatic like system
Static like stain
Mother Nature’s lost detergent
Just got eaten by the rain…

Butwearyourpinkdresswithhighheelshoes.

This Augury has a typo…

Um, you thought I was lying, huh?

CAUTION:
The following Blog post will include name dropping, and may cause bouts of jealousy, awe, and a yearning to be my best friend.

Far be it from me to speak of the many celebrities, celeb-tots, and celeb-nots I have met in the past few months, but alas, I must feed your desire to know about how the other half lives.

This past week (she takes a deep breath), was filled to the brim with food, fun and friends. Let’s recap shall we?

THURSDAY
FACT: My car was in the shop, so I had to accompany my field producer roommate to an interview with Motley Crew.
FACT: Tommy and Nikki Six were rockers to the 10th degree.
FALSE: I made out with Tommy Lee.

FRIDAY
FACT: I had a marvelous dinner in a private tea-room built for two with a great guy.
FACT: Saw The Aviator , not a fan.
FALSE: Eating raw salmon will make you turn into a pumpkin.

SATURDAY
FACT: The Sunset Room in Hollywood has lost its edge.
FACT: The Rock Store does not sell rocks.
FACT: Barney’s Beanery in Santa Monica is a great place to meet Australian tourists.
MULTIPLE CHOICE: Alcohol + Boys – Inhibition + Hollywood = too much fun to mention.

SUNDAY
FACT: Malibu road trip with best buds is what life is made of.
FACT: Jay Leno told me about his brother’s restaurant Leno’s Clam Bar in New Rochelle.
FACT: You know you’re cool when you’ve been in LA for 5 months and you get to go to the William Morris Agency Post-Grammy party.
FACT: Billy Idol sang Mo' Mo' Mo' to me… furthermore, in the middle of a song on stage, he said he liked my hair (um, I know, makes ya sick doesn’t it).
FACT: Billy’s guitarist was practically in my lap jamming like it’s 2005 (um, it is 2005).
FACT: Big & Rich showed me much love, and I most certainly did “save a horse by riding a cowboy."

QUESTION OF THE DAY: Who’s gonna be my Valentine?

The world is on fire, and it started with a burning...
Bush

When your fate is decided by a Cabinet
Your buttons they push.

North Korea, Saudi Arabia, India, Russia, FREEZE

Chip implants
Sycophants
Money
Power
Disease

So get ready to take that ride
On the hand-basket weaved out of blood

And when Uncle Sam comes knocking at your door
Tell him he misunderstood

War is the only way we… no.

Bored? Read what my part time lover has to say:

http://www.chomsky.info/

Some times, sorry
Tends to
Erase all that was
Virtually
Existent.

But not today.

She wishes she could do it over (I think)

Because maybe she’s still confused.

Saying farewell is easier than admitting you’re in too deep.

(it haunts her)

Life: get me another compress, my ticker’s on exchange
Love: Don’t refill my wine glass, this girl’s insane
Muse: Ordinary got into a wrestling match, now she’s tame
LA: Let me know when you’re back from mundane


P.S. It’s been one of those days.

(she’s callous)

I’m sick of talking, to me.

a litany:

It’s not that Christianity, or Judaism, or the Nation of Islam, or Satanist, or Scientist, or (insert other religion here) are wrong. It’s not that they are right. They are. Isn’t that enough? Go ahead and wear your bumper stickers and your swastikas, and your donkey mask.
(hail Mary)
Let’s just suppose Christians loved unconditionally, or that Jews weren’t really chosen, more so they were…

what I say they are.

Be offended.

Because your job sucks and your wife doesn’t.

Get angry.

Because the incompetent Mr. PedophileofthePresident just got a raise.

Sit there.

On your pathetic couch, with your pathetic beer, watching the lives of others unfold. While your laundry is still in the dryer.

You see, you can complain, and blame, and disdain, but isn’t that way more comfortable than putting on that Armani suit, with matching pinstripe socks?

We can joke about politics or laugh about life, because why are we HEAR anyway?

We’re here, aren’t we?

It is possible that we can all be right, and all be wrong at the same time.

Time isn’t just the continuum, it’s the (continue… um.).

When I die, McDonalds will still be open, but In & Out might come out of the closet. Mother Nature will still consume. Cannibalism will still exist (sexist meat eater). But to me, the end of the world has arrived. Apocalypse, now? Because it seems we are all the antichrist, in charge of our own demise.

So what happens when we cease to exist, or co-exist? We lease, our bodies to the soul (blame him). But we still exist, in the memory, and the pain, and the drama… to someone, somewhere.

Vanity looks better when we are blind.

Or maybe pork just taste better when there is mustard on my mashed potatoes.
Existence just called, could you take a message for me?

The backdrop of humanity has always been a fake scene. (serene)

It’s not about who’s running the show, but the players who keep getting put on the bench.

(elation)

Create me another storefront (shortfall takes another stab).