CHANGE IS COMING!!!
Doing a re-vamp of the site, pardon our appearance during construction!

Guess who just got engaged!!!??

better pics to come... whoooooooooHOOOOOOOOO

This weekend, December 12th, was Christmas! Well, we celebrated Christmas that is... Ryan's mother has to go to NJ to visit her father who is getting surgery, so she is going to be gone through X-mas, so we had Christmas on Saturday... we slept over at his parents on Friday night and woke up to Santa's bevvy of yuletide booty!

It's funny, because we slept in Ryan's old room... I hadn't been in his old room since I was about 16 or 17. When I used to go up to visit him I had to stay in his sister's room. So many memories!!!

Santa treated us very well, I might add... a gift certificate to go to a Zoo (I asked Santa for some "excursion" type gifts), an ice cream maker (made pumpkin ice cream last night!), and a bunch of other stuff, including a filled stocking and new Christmas PJs (which we were required to open on "Christmas Eve" and wear).

Had a blast, and although it was mid-December, totally felt like Christmas! We ate our selves silly and watched Christmas movies and played with his niece. Oh what fun it is too....

I still didn't take any pictures of our tree and houselights, daggonnnnnit...I'll get on top of that soon.

Here's us in front of his parent's tree.

Dearest Blog, I have not forsaken thee...
It's been rather busy in the Esser-Johnson household. We got our Christmas tree yesterday my in-laws came over to help decorate and hang lights, this is my first time with a REAL tree in a HOUSE. LOVE IT!!!!!!! I'll put up some pics in a bit. Turkey Day was great, didn't overeat... now it's back to the grind. Can't believe its the HOLIdaze already!!! Wanna know what I want for KwanzaaChristmasaka???
Hm... here's a partial musing:
-A new granite composite sink
-New counters for the kitchen (to go with my new sink)
-Books about gardening (indoor and outdoor plants)
-Wine making kit
-Recipe Books
-Craft Books & Supplies
-Re-Gifted stuff that is laying around your house that you never use (like -stationary, candles, candle holders, Messmer Teacher re-gifts, etc)
-BRYNA- I WANT YOU TO MAKE ME A FRAMED PHOTOGRAPH (like the pictures you take of flowers and frame them so they look all professional and stuff)
-NICOLE - hand-made recipe book
and a partridge in a pear...

Phew, it's been a while... sorry my little blog-flowers. Renovations galore, so tired at the end of the day, my lame butt is asleep by like 10! On Halloween...I painted ALL day and put together bookshelves and hung curtains. Didn't even REMOTELY dress up, kids don't come trick-or-treating on the streets here, they have some thing at the mall where everyone goes... so I didn't get any candy, and then 5 kids stopped by around 9:30 PM, and me and Ryan are like OH SHIT! So we gave them what we had:
Quarters and some Hansen's diet cherry soda, heeheee, we were laughing so hard. I almost gave them the canned sauerkraut we had in our cabinet!

Anywhoo, still quite a bit more decorating to do, but here's the kitchen and my office so far. DIG IT!

Bryna- I PROMISE I will try to call you at 6ish when you are off this week!!! Oh, and post some Hallow's Eve pics, I LOVE Suz's costume!

So "Anonymous" left me a comment that made me chuckle. (See Wednesday September 16th post).
Here it is:

finally - get the fuck out of this state you ugly whore
Anonymous | 10.01.09 - 4:48 pm | #

I LOVE the fact that either a jealous guy or a woman scorned felt inclined to show me some love. Never had hate mail before, WHOOHOHOOOOOOOOOO, dig it!

this girl moved.
she did.

so much to update... i LOVE LOVE LOVE being a house wife.
Just had a new kitchen floor put down (see also my man is quite the handy-man)
Re-doing and Re-decorating, that's the name of the game.

Ryan and I are doing swell... can't get enough of him. Love having fishes and kitties and all those domesticated things.
Pics to follow shortly.

Before and After of the very red (very very red) kitchen that I am alpha-tizing above.

Need some re-modeling ideas folks! Send 'em my way!!!
hee haw.

it's official. ryan (pronounced "RHYYYYYaaaaaaan")and i will officially be roommates on October 3rd 2009.

selling all my shit this weekend, hopefully. more like GIVING it away.

goodbye Cali, you've been a pioneer of blissful existence.

North Cacka-lacka, here I come!!!!!

reunited... and it feels so good.
story to follow, but here's a glimpse:
boy grew up in same town as girl.
boy and girl are in 6th grade together.
boy moves away.
boy comes to visit cousin when they are about 15.
boy and girl fall in love.
boy and girl date for a few years, long distance.
girl goes to college.
boy and girl are still wildly in love.
girl and boy split... because she wants to travel the world and this and that and he...well he's not so into thising and thating.
boy and girl don't talk for years and years.
boy contacts girl 10 years later.
boy visits girl.
boy and girl are still in love.

alpha moves to a different state, to be with boy.
to be continued...

Vegas Baby!!!! For my bro's b-day, so much to tell, so little time.
On another note... ATG is in LOVE (details to follow)
GET THIS GIRL SOME: THISING and THATING

while the past gives her dandelion a blow...

RYAN!!! Totally calling you later today, can't wait to catch up.
Holy Shit!

Okay, so I'm perusing Craigslist tonight...not feeling like going anywhere (and making homemade pasta and bread instead!), and I do spy with my little eye this little gem. Seriously dude!!! LOVE THE PIC!!! Ha, this almost made me wet myself. Complete with matching douche bag post... feels like I'm in Durty Jersey again.

If this is the LA dating pool, then methinks I'm in for quite a dry spell.

Dig it.


Here's the posting (Men for Women section)----------------------------

Only for ladies who know the real man is. No small tit ladies, only big tits. I bench press you to turn you on. I work out much because I am real man. Man who do not work out not real man. I am real man. You will see. You getting the wetness when you see my muscles. No pic no reply.

* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

image 1323499561-0

PostingID: 1323499561

Just got back from the Jerse, had a blast... so good to see family and friends. Only snafu was on the last day before I left, I dropped my dad off at the ER... he's in ICU and has to stay there for a few days, so he's in some pretty bad shape. Just glad I was there or else he would have waited an extra day to go to the hospital.

It's funny how timing is... when you really start to think about it, maybe the whole purpose behind my trip was so that I would be there the time he got sick and insist he went into the hospital (when he was hell-bent on not going and just getting some rest). Think of the actions that had to take place, since the day I was born to make that happen! So keep Dave Johnson in your thoughts and prayers or rain-god dances...

I have so many funny stories and events and happenings to share... one funny tidbit is that one of my dad's friends gave me a $50 check for my birthday, I was like "whoa, this person doesn't even know me!!!", well we can all guess what happened there, right??? The check bounced and MY bank charged me a $12 fee, so funny, you have to laugh at the irony! So in actuality, I guess I ended up paying that lady $12 for my bday, hehee. Life is good.

On another note... I told my ex never to contact me again. So it's truly over on my end. He was calling and e-mailing and what not so I had to lay down the law. I'm totally ready to move on and date someone in the non-crazy realm.

I'm going to try online dating, like eHarmony or something like that. I meet folks all over the place and never had an issue meeting folks but I need to get away from dating the same type of person every time (tall, white, brown hair, blue eyes, tortured soul).

So I'll let you know how that goes, if anything, should make for some awesome blogging fodder.

Love it.

So I had my very first bout of domestic violence last night. Don’t worry, I wasn’t hit or anything, but my ex-boyfriend DEFINITELY crossed the line when it comes to how to behave rationally.

It was quite strange, and I was debating on whether I would share, and decided that I would, because I figure I’m lucky that this is the first time I have ever encountered a situation such as this, and maybe this will remind me next time to REALLY get to know someone before: movinginmakingbabyplansmarryinglivingtogether

Long story short:
Don’t date crazy people.

Long story long:
1.5 years I spent getting to know my ex-beau… and it appears I did not know him at all (which kind of sucks, but whatever, plenty more fishes in the sea to choose from, but seriously, what the hell is with you men, you are all utterly fucking nuts).

So he says he wants to take me out for my birthday, I’m like “hell yeah”. Even though things have been quite rocky with us lately (SEE ALSO: He couldn’t seem to get over the fact that I went on a mini vacation without him~ June 30th San Fran Vacay with Nixie), he kept telling me he felt he was going “crazy in his head”, he was extremely stressed all the time seemingly for no reason, he started drinking more than usual, he exhibited mid-life crisis type behavior, the list goes on and on…)

So last night, I pick him up, and he seemed agitated right from the onset. We get some groceries and eat out on the balcony, beautiful night sipping some wine,
everything.
seemed.
fine.

So then we go inside, ready to watch a movie, and he mentions something ONCE AGAIN about the San Francisco trip (seriously dude, that was over a month ago and I went for three fucking days) and how he was not happy about it. My response was “I can’t change the past, but we can certainly take a trip any time you’d like.”

To which he stands up, his eyes bulge out of his head, his face turns bright red, he starts SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS (I mean FOR REAL screaming) that HE IS SO ANGRY, and HE’S NEVER BEEN SO MAD IN HIS LIFE, and some other choice words in between.

I’m kind of taken off guard a bit, but I very calmly say, “You need to calm down, I have no idea what is wrong”. To which he walks over to my dining table, grabs a chair and thrust it over his head.

(Pause)
What was I doing?? Just sitting on the couch, unflinching, thinking how very weird this situation was
(Restart)

So he’s all SCREAMING like a mad man, practically foaming at the mouth and he takes the chair and slams it onto the floor, bending the solid metal rod that was the leg of the chair.

*GASP* (so what do you do ATG???)
I grab his shoes, open the door and say very politely “You need to leave”. He walks out, I shut the door, return to the couch and press “Play” to begin my movie.

So fucking weird.

But that’s life sometimes… totally unpredictable, a fair-weathered friend and foe that smiles in your sunshine face while brewing up a thunderstorm beneath.

Some birthday though, huh??!! I sure know how to pick ‘em! Oi vey.

So today is my ACTUAL birthday, Jodi Lee's was on the 27th, but hey, who's counting. It's all up hill from here, right???

for those that need reminding, here's the story


so sing to me oh bloglets... for today is thine actual creation date.

DURTY FUCKIN' THIRTY B-day Bash in LA (part uno)
whooohoooo

Um, I'm officially old. WOOT WOOT!!!!

went to the Premiere of Orphan
pleasantly surprised
middle and ending were pretty darn OK

thought it would be the norm "possessed child" storyline, good twist of fate.
dig it.

so today, i was going through my record collection that I haven't looked at in years... and methinks I hit the proverbial goldmine!!!
um I found my Beatles White Album, that had an original poster in it... as well as blown up pics of the 4 Beatles, not too mention my pics of Prince naked (eewwwww) and Marilyn Monroe record. I won't even get started on my MJ collection...

that was just the tip of the iceberg, tons of other stuff, lordy lordy, what the fuck have I been hording all these years!

hmmmm will she hold on to them or try to sell??? make your wagers now...

I just received a "CNN BREAKING NEWS" alert in my e-mail inbox. Here's the news:

-- At memorial service in L.A., Michael Jackson's daughter Paris says he was "the best father you could ever imagine."

Watch live coverage now on http://CNN.com/Live --

HEY NEWS DOUCHEBAGS, THAT IS NOT NEWS!!!! What the holyfuck is this world coming too?!?
FUCKING FUCK FUCK, is it just me?

I dug MJ's music just like everyone else, but come on! He was NOT the messiah, he didn't save lives or do miracles, he just did what he had talent to do. When a talented entertainer overshadows real world lives and people, that's a sad day. When an entertainer warrants more effect on people than war, death, love, life, living... then we have veered far off the path.

this gets a double WTFWTF in the ATG archives.

so much to post so little time... grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, I want to tell all about my this past week, vacation, MJs death and much much more
but alas
I found an ad in "Glamour" magazine. Um, tell me if this isn't the spittin' image of me!!! Where the hell are my royalties!

Not too mention it is a MIDOL ad.
I'm suing.

i was on vacay (SEE ALSO: Napa, Old Faithful, Petrified Forest, Dodgers Game, MJ Star)
so much transpires in a week
MJ... COME BACK
more to follow but here's some feax-tos to keep you entertained

Transform me. Adorn me. Scorn me.
But don't take away my canvas.

-me. 2004

So funny, this whole Lakers thing. Every "news" station in LA is all about it, how 90,000 folks are in the Coliseum and lining the streets for the parade today.
I laugh.
I think to myself.
whoa... over 90,000 people (they scan the crowd)
Mexicans. 90,000 of them. Blacks. 90,000 of them
Whites. 10 or 20.

Clearly white people couldn't skip out on work to attend.
How many of these folks are lining up to make a difference.
Unless cheering on a bunch of men that shoot a ball into a hoop is progress.

These are where my tax dollars are going. To pay for the 90,000 minorities who are going to the Lakers Victory Parade

Bitter? Me? Because I bust my ass and pay the healthcare of all these folks who are here illegally? because I bust my ass and pay for the welfare folks that claim they have a "disability" such as Adult Attention Deficit Disorder?

Bitter?

No. of course not. I mean it's not like there is actually NEWS going on in the world. Not like there are wars or famine or injustice or inequality or.
nope.

Just bitter me.

i don't know
i guess
i guess
i guess i love everyone up to a certain

(buckets of moonbeams in our hands)

co-habit-ate
not so sure i take the bait
cause this fish pond is aching for aches

dropped in a line
said she was just fine
or maybe she's lyin'

don't let me catch you crying, or giving this ole' ticker a run for its
shut

eatin' my eat and drinking rot-gut

making my way and twirlin' my twirl
when's this ole woman
gonna stop being a little girl...

National Spelling Bee

we were SO into it.
we knew she would win.

Congratulations to my brother and his wife for welcoming Baby Dean into life last night!!! What a trooper, poor thing had the umbilical chord wrapped around his neck... he's got a lot of machines working on him, but he's doing well!

i was always this way.

like the way creative people are boringly artistic. and unimaginatively inhibited to be the same.
or the way religious people are overly sensitive. (no really, Jesus DID actually come to my house on Saturday and watch porn)

or the way utopia is chameleon. changing with every ebb and flow, dance and show, cradle and grow. static is not in its discourse.

unapologetically. irrevocably.

me.

So you want to piss and moan about Life, huh? Like Life is going to grab the microphone out of your hand and give an apology or something?

Like the gods are going to justify tattooing your landscape with roadways and fear??


GET THIS GIRL SOME: gps rantings
because you-turns can always appear