This article requires a full posting, not just a link, and all God’s people said, FUCK YOU AMERICA, we’s having a party...

Private Money to pay for $40 Million Inauguration
http://www.cnn.com/2005/ALLPOLITICS/01/13/inauguration.costs.ap/index.html

WASHINGTON (AP) -- It will take President Bush less than a minute to take the oath of office next Thursday, but before the inaugural events are over some $40 million may be spent on parades, parties and pyrotechnics.

That doesn't include the costs of the most intense security operation in inaugural history.

The amount spent on this year's festivities will rival the $40 million raised to celebrate Bush's first inauguration in 2001, and will exceed the $33 million spent by President Clinton in 1993 when Democrats returned to the White House for the first time in 12 years.

While the partying is being paid for privately, there have been some mutterings about the scale of the celebrations at a time of war and natural disaster.

Money for the celebratory activities is being raised by the Presidential Inaugural Committee, which as of the end of last week had received $18 million, much in six-figure donations from wealthy supporters and corporate spons

My heart goes out.

It’s not easy coming to grips with death and destruction and the wrath of Mother Nature. 100,000 people, families, villages, friends, lovers, enemies, dreamers, children, parents, generations, lives, destroyed.

And somehow it’s different this time, because the death toll is so high, and you can’t help to think about it, but what can you do, and what can you say. You mention it in conversation, as if remembrance of those struggling will help the missing and the ailing and the half-gone. For me it is a matter of deliberation.

I think about people all over the world, children weeping and diseased, in pain. Teenagers struggling to survive. Parents fearing for their offspring. Thousands of years of evolving and revolving, and still we can’t fight the common cold.

But WE can fight. And fight we do... everyday, we find a new reason to make war with another nation. Every second, someone is plotting against a country, or a race, or a religious group. We fight, in the name of Death, because Life is just too complicated.

Struggle.

But this one is man vs. nature. Don’t worry, man vs. man is coming soon.

So the next time you complain about your job, or that your morning coffee is too hot, or that the elevators take too long, or the waitress you have is too slow, or your parents don’t love you, or your friends don’t care about you, or your house is too small, or your money is not enough, or your girlfriend flirts too much. Think Death.

It looms like dishonesty.

Mein Kampf. What about yours?

We spend our entire lives trying to become whole after the half-life that was taken through our childhood. We swear we will never return to whence we came, to the town that stole our livelihood, our dreams, our hopes, or what should have been our reality.

We make secret pacts to ourselves, never to return to our past, our awful pasts, and that we will not let all that has made us who we are haunt us. We are different.

You and I, we are not that small hick-town we were born in. Or that corner store we used to hang around, or that kid from down the block that would never do anything or be anyone or go anywhere.

I returned. But don’t you know who you are? Didn’t you always?

You are not your past, you may not even be your present, but you can be your future. So get past it. Life ends. And given the latest headlines, perhaps the end is closer than we assume:

Dollar hits new low versus euro

- The US dollar has continued its record-breaking slide and has tumbled to a new low against the euro.
Russia and China plan war games

- Russia and China - former Cold War foes - will hold an unprecedented military exercise in the second half of 2005.

Asia battles earthquake aftermath

- Many do not know if missing relatives are dead or alive. Survivors and rescuers are battling the devastation left by sea surges that wiped out entire communities, killing about 23,000 people.

'Artificial life' comes step closer

-Researchers at Rockefeller University in the US have made the first tentative steps towards creating a form of artificial life.


What’s it all about? You. Me. Love. Life. Forgiveness. Faith. Honor. Money. Individuality. Respect. Trusts. Death. Living. Giving. Trying. Buying. Sighing. Knowing. Showing. Growing. It’s all what you make of it.

So stop thinking you’ll be happy when you get “that” job, or have “that” much money, or when you find “that” someone. Because it’s not really where you’ve been, or what you're doing now, it’s where your going.

Well… have you bought your ticket yet?

Not really busy, more like occupied of mind. Mental states like Jersey drives, she’s in like. Thinking consumed, feelings exhume, not enough room, for the both of:

US (gait moves closer)

Ode To Sleep


Let's just say that Alpha The Great has taken a break from her usual scandalous rendezvous' and had been retiring early.

Sleep: rejuvenate me
Sleep: recreate me
Sleep: dominate me

11 hour naps (she said) and still she's late to work.

Docile dreams of hanging Life's laundry (she thought).
Acquiescent being of non-destruction (she whispered).
The conjugation of Remiss and Hebetude

Well rested.

But alas, the weekend beckons…

I slept.

And it was the slumber that most only dream about.

12 hours, locked in the chambers of my mind escape
this is what she came up with:

A sitcom about something, instead of nothing
A movie about everything, instead of one thing
A conflict

What sells?
What cells…turn a profit?

Dissidence meets with Rivalry, they get divorced and have a stepchild, and Discord gets a front seat view.

25 years on earth, and you're no millionaire. Maybe that's just not where your aortic valve leads.

You should have a house
You should have a job
You should have a life
You should have a marriage
You should have a…
Or maybe, I'm just happy with a good cup of coffee.

I'm a producer, and a conducer and a inducer.

Watch me writhe (I need an outlet)

Because I'm not where you want me to be, and I'm not where my life can be seen, and I'm not part of the celebrity scene. Or maybe you should just listen to silence (golden).

I'm ready. So don't disburden your truckload of worriment my way (I'm no one)
So put that in your bevy of nonchalance, and tell me another song.

P.S. She's…not who you want her to be (go figure).

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

There, that's better.

It bothers me.

New York was the city I both loved and loathed equally. Los Angeles is the city that I neither love or loathe similarly.

Let me begin by stating, life is less than short. I feel like this particular Blog is going to focus more on you, instead of me. I see it everyday. Mundane has taken control of the lives that inhabit this earth.

Don't you know that your time here is short? Live it. Fall in love, then fall on your face. Break hearts. Be broken. Skydive. Go up to that boy you've been dreaming about. Give that girl from the coffee shop down the street a flower. Apply to that job that you know you could do better than anyone else.

What do you have to lose? I'll tell you… TIME. Your wasting time with every breath you take. POOF (it's over), and your still complaining about your boss. Tell him to shove his grandesoylatte up his ass, AND LIVE.

Is it about money? Maybe for you it is, or maybe it's about people, or maybe it's just about life. Whatever it is about for you, MAKE IT HAPPEN.

Get married. Have kids. Go horseback riding. Climb the Great Wall. Get divorced. Swim with dolphins. Take your kids to breakfast. Fly to the moon. Write your poem to the world.

LIVE. LIVE I SAY!

Yes, there will be pain. Yes, people you love will come and go out of your life. Yes, you may fail 30 times before you succeed. But, alas… to try is better than to die.

And let's face it. We all die.

So stop watching the Airbrushed-ThinnnerThanYou-BotoxLips-DroppedOutOfHighschool-RunOfTheMill-CousinToSomeBigShotProducer who just got the role you wanted, and give it another go round.

P.S. Your Life just called, bring home some flowers.

Hm. And don't forget to send me a postcard.

Surprise, Surprise. Our humble narrator returns from the abyss. It's been a while, but that's because she's resting (or was it restless?)

The holidays abound, and let's not lose focus. Whether your nucleus is a fat man plummeting down your chimney, or a devout man hanging on your cross, now's the time to make change (CARBON COPY: Male Dominated Society, BLIND CARBON COPY: Veil Dominated Society)

Not in my world… AlphaFemale prevails.


And by change I mean be a mover/shaker.

She left, you know. To escape the hustle and bustle that is New York (fetus of self-expression), she made her escape route.

What did she find, you ask?

Transform me. Adorn me. Scorn me.
But don't take away my canvas.

So, Muse just bought a new star, and Alpha The Great is drinking at the fountain… give them some time, they're daring.

And who are you today?

Day of days
Time’s repent
I sauntered about
The hour was unbent
Traveled afar
The world took me back
Tried to unwind
But the life-trains off track.
Moved over a mountain
Or a rainbow moved me
Could have swallowed life whole
But I’d choke on the sea
Held my dreams
‘Cause Muse couldn’t get out
Gave my money to the gods
So they’d figure it out
Left my home for a vision
Followed existence down the cracks
Now my souls leading
And there’s no turning back.
Thought the sun was shining
But paint covered the walls
Thinking about seasons
Walking around Fall
Been told what I’m saying
Tried given in to words
But the only thing it bought me
Was Idiosyncrasies, Absurd.

But alas… she finds another escape route (find her)

Today, in Century City, CA (where I work) there was a power outage (um, NY Blackout… the comeback?), therefore my building did not have power until 11am. What does that mean? It means you have a bunch of worker bees buzzing about, complaining about the long line downstairs for coffee, because that was the only coffee machine that appeared to be working. What else does that mean? It means Alpha The Great got a chance to ponder, and ponder she did. I began to handwrite a list (no, not my Christmas wish list) of questions that pertain to existence.

Now, it’s not like I am the first mover or shaker with the questions on this list, scholars, philosophers and the like have debated the questions I present for quite some time. I was merely creating the list so that the next time I enter into a relationship (a friendship, an acquaintance, or even a deliciously lovely committed love affair), that I should know the other person’s standpoint on these particular questions. The lights came back on before I could even begin to finish the list, and I will definitely brainstorm some more questions as the week’s progress, but here’s my starting point. So, if you consider yourself my best friend, acquaintance, or whatever… next time you see me, let’s discuss. Or even better, tell me the questions that are on your mind, because isn’t that what life is about: People and their actions, in pursuit of happiness, within this unpredictable things we call existence…(I don’t know, is that what life is about? You tell me)...

What is life? Is it individual or holistic? Is there one definition, or can you make of it whatever you want it to be?

Why are “we” here? Why are “you” here? Is that the same question?

What is religion? What is belief? Can you have faith without religion or belief?

Who are you without your “god”?

What religious argument is most convincing (Christianity, Judaism, Muslim, etc.)?

What would people say about you in your eulogy today?

What do you wish they would say about you in your eulogy if you live 50 more years?

What is family? Is family necessary?

What is success? Is there such a thing? Once you obtain it, don’t you set more goals, so therefore can success ever be obtained?

Animals: Food, Friend, or Both?

What is love? Is there such a thing as unconditional love? Can you love more than one person (as in relationship love)?

Are we our jobs? Are we the money we make?

Is democracy the best form of government? Should it be embraced by all countries, or is it better to have diversity in various countries?

Are looks everything?

Thousands of product choices: good thing or bad thing?

Should morality/ethics be taught in grade school? Whose ethical code or morals should be taught?

So that’s about as far as I got before the building god’s said, “let there be light”. This is just surface level stuff before I bring out the heavy artillery. We didn't even begin to delve into this thing we call Alpha's Mind. Stay tuned...

Someone stole Muse’s pillow

She dreamt.

But she didn’t have to dream, because her escape was lying next to her.

She slept.

And Restless bought a new pair of slippers.

She thought.

A little bit of like is lovelier than a lot of love, unrequited.

She fell.

But perhaps she doesn’t want to get picked up, this time.

He’ll meditate on that one, you know, and sometimes a ditty is worth a thousand ponders.

She can’t get enough of…

He’s watching.

She never could keep a secret (fallible)

She’s twisted.

Or…maybe…he…just…makes…her…smile.

louche \LOOSH\, adjective: Of questionable taste or morality; disreputable or indecent; dubious; shady.

The epitome of epiphany strikes again
(just hold me)
The embodiment of effectuation.
(just scold me)
She’s thriving.
(just mold me)
Catharsis vs. Narcissus the battle begins
(just…me)

Far be it from me to copy the likes of Britney Spears, but alas, I am digging in the archives for my “Best Of Alpha The Great” montage. Today, I’ll bring back an oldie but goodie from the Archives De’ Alpha The Great. This ditty is among my favorites… but don’t go thinking Muse is out to lunch or anything, she’s right here. It’s just that, this morning has been a lot more than pleasant, a bit less than extraordinary, and just about lovely.

Why you ask?

Hm, it seems the stars are in alignment today, and the gods have blessed me with bliss. No particular reason. Maybe it was Mr. Sun licking my eyelids, or perhaps the fact that traffic seems much more pleasurable when Janis Joplin is whispering in your ear. Or maybe, this is how it should be… bliss, for no apparent reason.

So, I’m taking you Back, because Front just got another gig. Even more apropos is the fact that this was birthed last November (who said life wasn’t cyclical?):

And then they danced...
Because sometimes their mood was blue in hue
And sometimes the gray was used in lieu
And always they seemed to have a muse
Even when it rained.

They felt like crimson
Or maybe brown
As their feet floated
Across the ground.

Lovely.

But they didn't know how
And they didn't know why
But they decided to dance
Instead of to cry.

posted by Alpha The Great : 11:02 PM Saturday, November 08, 2003

Inner monologue of a cornflake:


2.3: “You’re fortunate, you know. I mean, you were born ‘you’ and not someone else. See that guy over there begging for your food scraps? That could have been you.”

Half Past Nine: “So maybe I had a bad day.”

2.3: “See that girl on the screen screaming while bombs go off in her back yard? That could have been you.”

Half Past Nine: “And maybe the week hasn’t been going so well.”

2.3: It’s just that, we take it, ya know. Life, that is. And we complain about what we don’t have, and what we do have, and what we should have. But it only gets better when you realize who we are.”

Half Past Nine: “But what’s the point…”

2.3: “Question mark.”


…because sometimes life doesn’t make cents.

Careless, like the whisper
I dropped you.

Shedding tears
Holding back the years
Your missing.

Drain, you claimed
I’m to blame

I miss you.

P.S. my bracelet fell in the toilet

For my next number, I will be chanting a guttural solo from the bowels of my mindscape...

LA LA Land:
Hm. Here in the world of stars, everyone is dumb. And by dumb I mean “not smart”. (SEE ALSO: Ignorant; CARBON COPY: Unapprised) It appears the majority of people should own stock in chapstick, because all they do is kiss asses all day. Here, just might be, the Ass-Kissing Capital of the world (get your license plates today!). Leave it to me to generalize a whole population (can we say, BIASED?), but methinks I might have hit the nail on the head (insert old-school adage here).

New York (abdomen of coolness), I don’t miss your weather, or your snobbery. But I do miss the “realness” of your personality. You are genuine (most times). You feed me mentally, you keep me grounded, and you excite my being.

California (Fingertip of Feign, Pancreas of Unreality), it’s hard to have a bad day when the sun is shining on your should blades. I can get past your nepotism and your egotism, as long as you continue to entertain me. And by entertain, I mean: show me another story. Muse really likes it out here, the boys, the nightlife, the… always something to watch-ed-ness of it all. Alpha The Great is indifferent. It’s not home, maybe that’s why it tastes so sweet. But where is home? Hm… I’ll let you know when I get there.

So where’s this all going. I don’t know, Muse is taking a lunch break, and Alpha The Great is on vacation. Stick around for the punch line (because the soda fountain just got crowded).

Dearest Alpha The Great,

This is the last time I let you run me ragged. You boss me around, pushing me to my utmost limits. You use and abuse me. You do not let me replenish when I need it. You make me run on empty. You gave me less than 2 hours of rest last night. You ate chocolate candy all day, instead of nourishing me with substance. You filled me up with caffeine and stimulants. You don’t let me exercise. FUCK YOU, ALPHA THE GREAT.

Love,
Your Body

That kiss.

The moment you put it on paper, it’s gone.
The second you describe it to your friends, it dies.
The minute you sing it in your car, it expires.

That touch.

Try to remember its path.
Try to retain its emotion.
Try to preserve its energy.

That look.

He’s peering right through you.
He’s viewing your every move.
He’s seeing everything that you do.
Intimate portraits of you, displayed in the lens of his mind, or at least that is what you hope.

And maybe, this time, it is about you, instead of me…

Yeah, that’s right (she said), like strawberry pumpkin pie…

My reflection in the mirror scared me. Who is that haggard looking individual staring back so gauntly? Sleep Deprivation is a female dog named, Bitch. Sunken eyes, like treasure chests. Slumber (it haunts me)

Eyes of glaze
Mind of haze
Soul of craze

Exhausted. Likethatoldmufflerthatusedtoshootsparks.

So maybe she’s not cut out for this party lifestyle anymore (she’s dancing)
But the nightlife beckons…

Don’t get me wrong, I love porn as much as the next gal (ahem)… but, watching porn with co-workers? Perhaps that was a little awkward.

So I am temping at 20th Century Fox (an amazing company, I might add), and they have screenings every Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday of movies currently in theatres and classics from the Fox vault.
Motorcycle Diaries , Wimbledon , Sideways
all amongst the movies I have had the pleasure of viewing for free. But last night, I must say, I was rather shocked. They were showing the movie A Dirty Shame and let’s face it, I’m pretty darn liberal, but this movie made me want to take a shower to cleanse my soul of the filth I viewed.

-Naked ugly fat people, doing the nasty on the street
-The prolonged use of the word sexin’
-Crooked yellow teeth (um, yeah, that is what disturbed me most)
-A man getting off from defecating
-Really bad acting
-Semen spewing onto the camera lens
-Big hairy gay men rubbing up on each other
-A man jacking off while eating a used tissue

SEE ALSO: Syphilis
CARBON COPY: Gonorrhea
BLIND CARBON COPY: HIV

Perhaps in the confines of my own home, such a movie would not have warranted a second thought (as I most likely would have turned it off after the painfully ruinous opening which contained the worst acting I’ve seen since the Bush/Kerry debate). But I was trapped. Fox employees surrounded me as I sat by myself watching the utter debauchery unfold.

I laughed.

More so because I couldn’t help but think how desperate the actors/actresses must have been to agree to such an obtuse tale.

… and suddenly, she felt like Shakespeare’s crumpled up condom wrapper.

The glamorous people of never… where
And no wear
You know the place
What’s in your soul means less than what’s on your sole
The “always” people
always…
complaining
feigning
regaining
what was lost in the script

The Counselors Of Fake
And everyone’s a hero
And everyone’s a zero

I think I met you yesterday and yesterday and yesterday again for the first time
And even the pigeons need to sign a contract to eat in this town
Here doesn’t exist beyond,
Your… let’s talk about the weather.

So high, elated, at the thought of who
Goodbye, created a different mindset (askew)
Muse: Meet your soul mate, Gadabout…he’s bored
Maybe, you should take him to a football game.

Life: Rip my aortic valve out and tear me a new love hole.
Perhaps, you could feed my feelings to the lions.

Love: Throw my autonomy in the shredder.
Perchance, you would buy me another heart.

New York: Untie my shoelaces.
Conceivably, you stood for my indifference.

So now what?

wandering woman
the streets create you
you’re walking
who’s talking
about you… don’t see
they stare
matted hair
lethargic is your gait
all the time to wait
your scaring.

turned away
they say
wandering woman
you’re different

the streets don’t sigh
the streets don’t cry
i watch my bag, in your eyes

less home than home… less
trust is your antithesis
you’re suited (if soot were armor)

i’m staring

Glamorous for a moment
she thought
and the red carpet wore a veneer of disguises
it wept
the color of heart
devastated.

suffocating
3-D like pictures
vanity’s elixir…pink nail polish
and haze
strawberry malaise
all in a daze work.

And the red carpet lies
And the red carpet tries
And the red carpet buys

(it’s sullied)
Sunshine and Smog were arrested
Democracy put up bail

but the carpet was her sanctuary
(she’s tiring)

scarlet bolster of her soul, it haunts her.

Too much coffee, I feel restless.

Black tar elixir of my being
It consumes me
My energy source, fooled me once again

SEE ALSO: The Antichrist of Stimulant
CARBON COPY: The Archenemy of Depressant

and Muse is being tricked (it’s a guise)
dis
cover

seven cups of acid rain in my system… and still I close my eyes.

Bittersweet,

like candy coated memories
Fond of the cent of money.
Maybe we shouldn’t be here… driven
by
what makes
and takes
and forsakes
my eternity.

Today, I’m feeling rather: Muse, bring me another aspirin.
Too much bass in my song
all along
Where’s that old record I used to play?

Mr. King (B.B. that is) play me another riff.

I remember that painting, of the couple dancing…their hew was blue
But the lens was dirty.

Another
Laugh
Portends
Her
Allegory

But don’t think this is about you, it’s not.

In her final bravura, the curtain closed before she could bow.
She’s back
(and sometimes you don’t need an ending)

Election: the erection of a modern day rEaLiTy bites
Sound fights
Ballot’s Right, to a fair selection.

Billions spent
Need to repent
Your future went… when they elected a plant for president.

Bush-wacked
Kerry-slacked
Another democracy shifted, without the Fed (that is).

Sitbackandrelaxwithyoursoylatteandcornmuffin…
Lax… we were
a…sleep I concur
additive of lies
…cause your country just went down the shitter.

So, there’s this boy, right… and you know there is danger whenever Alpha The Great starts out like that, but our humble narrator can’t seem to keep Muse quiet.

Suddenly, falling in life with like is better than tripping on love with living.

And by love: I mean two squares shooting rubber bands at the moon’s freckles.

So, she digs him, right. And she usually loves to like, but liking never felt so…

Mesh like bag
Jet like lag
Cough like gag

Diminishing.

Muse, pour me a cup of tea with honey, it’s going to be a long night.

Some
Times
Eccentricity
Vindicates
Everything

And she’s the Queen of the Antonym of Normality’s Overbite…again